A Few Of My Favorite Things (for Traveling)
Sitting in my assigned seat on a recent flight to Miami staring out the window as the jet taxis down the runway, I start making a list in my head of all the things I should have brought with me. It’s the list I wanted to write down the last time I was on a trip and never got around to it. Now, I’m being proactive (it’s a new year, after all) and actually writing it down. I will share it with you because I want to spare you the agony of withing in your cramped middle seat while the dude next to you drools on your shoulder. Now here’s YOUR chance to be that guy! Yeah!
This is a two-part series because my list got a little long and let’s be honest, I have a short attention span and can only be proactive for so long. “Oh look, shiny things!” You get it.
The first part is about how planes have such a low humidly and can literally make you sick. The second part is more about creature comforts.
After you slog through that long line of people shuffling to get on the plane, you finally reach the cockpit. You start eyeing the overhead compartment for an empty space to stash your carry on. Bag stashed, you hurdle over the guy in the aisle seat and plunk yourself down to finally settle in. Immediately those fans up above start to suck the life out of you! The dying effect is almost instantaneous. How do people function in that environment?
Here is some of this stuff might help:
The last time I got off a plane and looked in the mirror my eyes were on fire! They were bright red and bloodshot. I looked like a vampire! I would have given my kingdom for some eye drops and that is pretty much what they wanted in the airport gift shop. So, sacrifice part of your fluid allotment when going through security and bring along some eye drops. My favorite is Rohto Eye Drops. I am not going to lie, everyone who has used this calls it the “eye orgasm”. Initially hot than an amazing feeling of relief! (TMI?)
I carry a small, empty spray bottle with me. I fill it up before I get on the plane and enjoy a refreshing spritz when my face feels like it’s getting ready to crack like the Sahara desert. You can also use it on the annoying kid who is kicking the seat behind you or the wanker who slams his seat back into your complimentary beverage. Fun!
Along with the empty spray bottle, carry on an empty travel mug to stay hydrated. Fill it up in the airport before you get on the plane. The cool thing is you can put ANYTHING in that mug and no one will be the wiser! (I think?) You will thank me when you realize that the snack cart in general seating will NEVER get to you. The stewards are too busy with the business section. I know because I sat in the business section ONCE. The Conitigo Travel mug is my favorite because it has a screw on lid and the handle will attach to lifelines when you go sailing with us.
I live in the Caribbean and I never have to use lip balm because it is so humid. But, while traveling, I really need it because everywhere I go, the air is drier than where I came from. My new favorite is cherry Chapstick – it’s a classic! I love the flavor and you can’t beat the price.
Sometimes you just want to splash some water on your face, right? Well, then you blindly grope for a paper towel to realize there isn’t any! Most airports have those annoying blow dryers. Imagine trying to fit your face under that air hole?! How embarrassing! I usually end up just using my shirt and people look at me funny when I walk out of the washroom. How about just throwing a washcloth into a plastic bag and tucking it into your carry on? You’re welcome!
You know that scratchy feeling you get in your throat when the air is so dry you can hardly swallow? That always happens to me when I get on a plane. I start coughing and can’t stop. Then, your seatmate scooches over to the far end of his seat and looks at you with disgust. (Perfect strangers do not have to honor the “in sickness and in health” bit.) Grab a bag of Wild Cherry Luden’s Cough Drops. Remember the ones you would eat like candy as a kid? Now that you are an adult, you can eat all you want and no one will care. Except for your seatmate and he will be happy. You could even share and make a new friend.
Ramp up your immune system when you travel. There are so many opportunities to catch raunchy germs that your body needs all the help it can get. You might already have a personal favorite but I like coconut-pineapple Emergen-C. It actually tastes good and comes in convenient packets. I would suggest starting your immune-boosting program a few days before you fly.
There you have it.
A few tips to keep you happy and healthy when you travel.
You are now free to move about the country!
Look for Part 2 – “A few MORE of my favorite things (for traveling)